Gingerbread Woman

Zen despite the crazymakers

I was up to see the sun rise this morning. Candyfloss colours striped the sky as the sun laid a golden path accross the ocean from the beach below the cliff at the end of Dad's garden to the faint line of the mist shrouded horizon. I was assuaged by biblical refernces, Jesus walking on water, the parting of the dead sea, and felt like the sun's bridge accross the ocean was a way of saying Freddie would live without barriers, a life with a clear path imprinted on the canvass of the natural world.

It was five fifteen, I am a tad sleep deprived, still, the natural inclination to take the piss out of myself has been resisted. Now is, I've decided, no time to get all witty at the expense of my spiritual side. I want to revel in gentleness, find things beautiful, be enveloped in mother nature's copuious bosom.

A few hours later, sat on the beach, sobbing for the first time in months, over a spectacular bit of simultaneous crazymaking by my mum and dad, (which I shan't recount for loyalty, and a fear you wouldn't belive the tales...) I reread this hand written entry and managed to rediscover zen with the image of my private sunrise.

I spent last night preparing for Fred's arrival in decadent fashion. I indulged in a pampering session that would suffice were Mr Depp himself coming for dinner. It isn't easy trying to shave, exfoliate and polish legs with a giant beachball obscuring the view of all but my inner ankle, regardless of bathtub angle. I thought of David Blunkett as I used my fingerips to check my handywork and wondered if that's why his usual look is stubbled. I did facepacks and hairpacks, slathered my skin in special bump potions. Everything about my body feels soft and sexy even if my breasts and bump are swelling faster than a behind plumped determinedly in a hornets nest.

I've swapped the witches skirt for new tactile trousers and a seriously flattering maternity top (both soft charcoal), and accessorised with my uber-bling deep green flower ring and a set of natural glossy wood beads that showcase hues of green and gold whilst resting on Freddie's feet.
I've done natural sunkissed make up, painted toes scarlet and finger nails clear in a wink to the supposed virgin/whore of everywoman. I feel fabulous.

'Ready Freddie?' I whisper to the bump
'nope, not yet' the belly replies.

posted by The Gypsy @ 10:35 am